Fearless Living: a Myth?

There is no such thing as no fear....only not allowing fear to run things.

If you are waiting to NOT be afraid
you’ll be waiting a long time.

I have yet to encounter ANY
pursuit
that does not carry with it
endless opportunities for FEAR.

FEAR of trying
FEAR of failing
FEAR of not knowing all the answers
FEAR of having to ask
FEAR of not having sufficient enthusiasm to see a thing all the way through
FEAR of someone not approving
FEAR of a bad memory being triggered
FEAR of appearing foolish
FEAR of not fitting in….

It’s amazing we get anything done at all!

* * *

The procrastinated-upon bike purchase decision
was nothing more than a long list of fears –

FEAR of getting one not suited to me
FEAR I wouldn’t really enjoy having one
FEAR it would be a pressure
leave me kicking myself every time I passed it by
as I hurried off to other things,
no time for it.

And the BiGGeST FEAR of all:
Knowing there was a reason
I’d stopped riding years ago,
FEAR that I’d remember what the reason was
immediately after my first ride.
Oh, right. THAT’s why I stopped riding a bike.

So
after much time and talk,
I finally take the step in front of me
and buy a bike.
Closure!
And the decision
is such a relief
it makes it into my Gratitude Journal.

* * *

Freed of my fears
I took off yesterday
for the local convenience store
to pick up stamps.
ON the bike.

“Be careful,”
said the woman behind me in line,
and then comes her story.
A bike, a dog dashing out,
a fall, a broken hip.

“Where?”
“Nolan Circle.”

Great.
FEAR of buying
replaced by
FEAR of riding.

I got back on the bike
and headed home,
steering clear of Nolan Circle.

Instead I made an enjoyable loop
down to the river,
where I gave some thought
to blogging about the experience.

There is no such thing as no fear.
only not allowing fear to take the steering wheel
or handlebars, as the case may be.

We take the next step
in spite of fear,
not in denial of it
and definitely not waiting for it to voluntarily walk away.

Can you name the fear that's keeping you from your clear next step?

About Marilyn

Reading, thinking, listening, writing and talking about faith, creativity, ESL for refugees, grief and finding the story in a story. Student of Spanish. Foe of procrastination. Cheez-it fan. People person with hermit tendencies or vice-versa. Thank you so much for reading.
This entry was posted in bike, creative killers, fear, fear of failure, fear of success, following through, next step, perseverance, procrastination, regret. Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to Fearless Living: a Myth?

  1. Juliana says:

    Marilyn thank you for this post today – I needed to hear (read) it!

    Like

  2. Marilyn says:

    I’m glad, Juliana. Thanks for letting me know. I was just about to turn off the light. Nice words to read just before falling to sleep. Thanks again.

    Like

  3. Fern says:

    I have to face two fears tomorrow — flying five and a half hours from Toronto to San Francisco, and being in an earthquake zone for a week. The earthquake in Haiti certainly put “the fear of God” into me. I will get on that plane, though, and go see my two-month old great-granddaughter, grandchildren, son and daughter-in-law.

    Like

  4. Fern, have a wonderful time with your family, as I am having with mine in England.

    Marilyn, not allowing fear to take the handle bars is a great thought to stow away as ammunition when fear strikes. Thank you for the enjoyable ride on your new bike. Was it crowded taking us with you? 🙂

    Like

  5. Marilyn says:

    Always plenty of room for my blog friends, Belinda.
    Have a great trip, Fern! I’m impressed with the fears you are acknowledging yet pushing past.

    Like

Share your thoughts!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s