Yo-Yo Facebooking

Is your history with Facebook as tempermental as mine? This is a repost from January 2009 with an update at the end.

picture-54 Just to be fair, I gave Facebook a second try yesterday. Eight minutes, the last five of which I was looking for how to bail. Seriously.

I no sooner REactivated my DEactivated account than I could almost hear hundreds – nay, thousands – of emails going out to all who had ever invited me to be a “friend,” everyone in my location network and anyone with any profile setting akin to mine: MARILYN has REACTIVATED.

So I RE-DEactivated. (They probably have a group for people like me. Yo-yo Facebookers.)

I’ll probably give it another try when they add a few more options to the “FRIENDS” invitation and go from



Decline/Accept/I’m sorry, but I haven’t even gotten around to see a friend’s new baby yet (make that TWO FRIENDS new babies!) and don’t think I ought to take on another social network before tending to the relationships I already have

or how about

Decline/Accept/Sorry, I’d love to, but I’m on a 12-step Cyber-Addiction recovery program and only get limited minutes a day to check email and post a blog entry?

Oh, I think I’ve got a winner with that last one!


Facebook offers some great features, though, so for all who ARE on it, have fun with it!

Update (Sept 2011): I’ve been back on FB for quite some time now and we have worked out a peaceful reconciliation. I’m glad for the people it’s put me back in touch with. I keep my “Friend List” trimmed and use discretion when deciding what to post broadly and what really ought to be a private direct message to someone.

About Marilyn

Reading, thinking, listening, writing and talking about faith, creativity, ESL for refugees, grief and finding the story in a story. Student of Spanish. Foe of procrastination. Cheez-it fan. People person with hermit tendencies or vice-versa. Thank you so much for reading.
This entry was posted in clutter, comfort zone, relationship, time management. Bookmark the permalink.

10 Responses to Yo-Yo Facebooking

  1. wally says:

    i understand the back and forth…i started facebooking (a verb now) a couple years ago, but minimally and hesitantly…now i’m all in. but the “all in” certainly isnt for everyone…i work with teens (as you know) and facebook is where they are, i need to be there with them. plus i’ve been happy to reconnect with several “blasts from the past”


  2. Belinda says:

    I LAUGHED at your quick dip into the ocean of Facebook and your hurried retreat from the tsunami of “friends!”

    I like it from distance an enjoy checking out what various people are up to and I love looking at other people’s photos–including new babies–although going to actually SEE the baby in person would be much better of course.

    The funniest thing happened this week. My daughter, who is MISS FACEBOOK herself, culled me from her friends list! Yikes! Have you heard of this “culling?” It’s when people decide they have hundreds of so called friends and there are too many, so they start to narrow the list to “real” friends. Can you imagine the trauma of being “culled?” In Brenda’s case it was because she felt she was having cyber relationships instead of real relationships and she wanted to only relate on FB to people she didn’t see in the flesh. She put me back on though when she saw that I was crushed. 🙂


  3. Marilyn says:

    Oh, I hadn’t even thought of the culling fields. 🙂

    I like Brenda’s plan, though. It sounds like a good compromise.


  4. Heather says:

    It’s really overwhelming to me also.
    I can’t keep up with all the other requests once you’re friends with them. I mainly do it for the pictures. AND I hope I’m one of the friends you mention not seeing their baby yet! I was talking with Seth and I don’t think I’ve seen you since October. We should get together soon, even for a lunch or short visit.


  5. Marilyn says:

    You know it, Heather! I’ve got you in my sights. Immunity issues have played havoc, but I think we’re breaking free now.


  6. kevin says:

    i was ‘invited’ to join facebook. i was fine not being on the computer except for going on my ‘favorites’ sites. that has changed, i find myself going on before work and then after work. and weekends way too much. i have ‘reconnected’ with friends as well as family members. is that a sign of the times with the ‘younger’ generation? is it better then email?
    in the end i am glad i accepted the ‘invite. i am able to connect with friends that i ‘lost’ over the years.. so when u get on facebook, “Can i be ur friend?”


  7. Beth says:

    Oh Marilyn, that was funny to read. 🙂 FB (look I’m even using the acronym!!!) is what we make it. You take all your relationships very seriously, so I’m sure FB would leave you feeling overwhelmed. Though if you tried to treat FB as the shallow end of the pool, it can actually be quicker and easier to keep track of multiple people than email. At least I’ve found it to be so.


  8. Belinda says:

    Marilyn, “The culling fields,” is too funny!


  9. Emily Webb says:

    Marilyn, I look at facebook as an extension of my church family gathering, and friends from way back have hailed me in since, and can see what’s going on in my life, and I can be a part of theirs as well.
    I don’t do all the “tests and quizes” because with dial up, it’s impossible, and to be honest, just seem so silly to want to find out what soda I am, or what muppet I am.(giggle)
    Although I did have facebook for a long time before I really got involved. My Japanese “daughter” got me in it first. Now my Netherland “Son”: is on too.
    Love your site!


  10. Char says:

    This inspired me to “cull” and I am getting a leaner meaner FB from the process! Thanks


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