MarilynYocum.com

WHEN the FIRST TWO CARPENTERS
turned me down

“Wouldn’t bother doing that.
I’d just rip it all out and put in new.”

my heart fell
but not all the way.

I rethought my vision
YET AGAIN -
only six years in the thinking already -

but when an idea
is shared and shot down,
a lot depends
on how much confidence you have in its merits.
Sometimes you have to go back
and remember
why it was important in the first place.
Hold tight.

* * *

WHEN the THIRD CARPENTER said yes
I wondered why
I’d waited to last
to ask him

since
fourteen years earlier
he’d gone along with another wild idea of mine -
never blinked,
just heard me out,
took my sketch,
came back
six weeks later
with the very thing,
finished,
looking better than I imagined
and for less than I thought.
He took my idea and made it shine.

Sometimes
you have to hand your idea off
to people who know what they are doing
and can do it better.
Loosen grip.

* * *

DETAILS HASHED OUT,
estimate received,
I went into the shop -
November sun shining
and all’s right with the world -
to sign.

“One slight change,”
I said to the man behind the counter.
“For the countertop,
I prefer Blackstar Granite.”
I passed him the sample chip.

I’d fallen prey to second-guessing.
and right on schedule for me.

Several days earlier
I’d gone to the showroom
ARMED not only
with the swatch-and-paint-chip folder
from recent household makeovers,
but also
wearing those very colors
as a safeguard.

(I am overwhelmed
in the face
of hundreds of color possibilities
and quickly lose my bearings)

I made a choice
that worked well with all,
one I liked
and best of all,
one I had imagined in my head
a year earlier,
Deepstar Mineral.*

BUT
almost immediately upon leaving the showroom
doubts rose.
I was sure my choice was wrong,

so I was back at the showroom,
settling on second choice,
not because first choice wasn’t available, mind you.

I WATCHED THE MAN behind the counter write down
both name and number
of my second choice
and when he turned away briefly
I leaned way over the counter
and looked again
to be sure he had it right.
For mental health purposes, that.

I slept like a baby
from that day
until
late last week
after the carpenter stopped by
to double-check some measurements
and verify which cabinet door
was getting a piece of glass.

Continued at “Sleepless in Ohio“

* my initial posting said it was Mesa Sunrise.

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